Easier said than done right? Nope, it’s easy!
How?
Putting your right (or left) foot forwards and walk the walk! We can all read and gain the knowledge and insight required to be brave in this (sometimes) challenging world but really and truly you have to put your foot forward and step into your truth (and out of your comfort zone)! What I am really saying here is, you must take action. Inspired action (that is in alignment with your goals, dreams, aspirations and truth).
I used to take my son to dance rehearsals with me when he was off school. He would see me take a lead role. He sees my confidence shining. He particularly enjoys and appreciates when I work with performers with disabilities as they develop differently. He joins in and stands at the front with me to help them. He likes to show them his dance skills also. This is so beautiful to witness.
I often make him part of my journey. Recently he came to watch as I completely stepped out of my comfort zone as I stood in front of investors to pitch for money. He knows this is not an everyday encounter for me, and he gets to see me pump my confidence into something that is quite scary for me.
How can we trust more?
Visualisation has changed my life. Period. How can we achieve something if we can’t first see it? I saw myself speaking in front of audiences well before I actually got up and gave my first talk. Once I achieved that, I started visualising bigger audiences and now I visualise myself doing TED talks (which, at the time of writing, I have not yet done).
Visualisation brings what you want into your life. For example, if you want to be free of the drama in your life, then you visualise a peaceful life where drama doesn’t feature.
A simple (yet powerful) task to help you further…
Try this simple exercise: Close your eyes and relax your body completely.
Stay firmly connected with the sensation of relaxation and, in your mind’s eye, see yourself speaking on camera or doing whatever activity it is that requires you to step out of your comfort zone, or have more confidence.
Allow the feelings of comfortable presence pervade your body and your mind. The more you practise this, the more familiar the feelings will become, and you will be able to tackle the tasks that previously induced feelings of stress or fear with more presence, and in turn greater confidence.
Go forth precious soul…
When breaking out of your comfort zone and starting something new, you are expanding your own limitations, and when you successfully complete something that is out of your confidence zone, you are building confidence in yourself.
Step out of your comfort zone (from time to time) – The comfort zone is a useful psychological concept that can help you embrace risk and make changes in your life that can lead to real personal growth. In our comfort zone, there is a sense of familiarity, security and certainty. When we step outside of our comfort zone, we're taking a risk, and opening ourselves up to the possibility of stress and anxiety; we're not quite sure what will happen and how we'll react. We're wired to seek out comfort, which is why it's so hard to let it go. There's nothing wrong with being in your comfort zone, unless you get too comfortable and start holding yourself back instead of challenging yourself to learn, grow and try new things.
Being slightly uncomfortable, whether or not by choice, can push us to achieve goals we never thought we could. But it’s important to remember that we don’t need to challenge ourselves and be productive all the time. A lot of the time, we lack confidence in our abilities because we don’t try to challenge ourselves. For example, there have been times when I have lacked confidence in public speaking but at the same time, I still don’t have much experience in doing it. I have spoken in front of audiences before and it has been a nerve- wracking experience that left me in a bit of a sweat. But the fear of public speaking is a common fear, and maybe that’s what was in my mind. People can become apt public speakers, with practice. So, I now take a different approach... I don’t avoid the opportunities to speak in public, I embrace the chance to step out of my comfort zone and confront my fear head on!
The key is to not let your body language undermine what it is you want to communicate. Since a large part of communication comes from body language, which includes posture and facial expressions, by taking care in the messages you put out, you become more aware of the image you're projecting, and this (believe it or not) will build a more confident you.
It’s all a process…
Everything is a process. A learning process (not a test). Acquired skill sets I sense.
First, you must trust yourself and allow the beautiful pathway to unfold right beneath you. Trust the process (as scary as that may feel for you right now).
I have found that the more trusting you are (of yourself, others, experiences, challenges, adversity faced and so forth), the more flourishing the outcome. The greater the rewards too. And yups, there is always a silver lining.
Trust, trust, trust. It is key in life (and it is safe to do so). Period.
Lots of love,
(bringing you more) Hope xox
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